Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
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