im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
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