try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
