Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
