quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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