I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
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