GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
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