She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Randomize
