Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Randomize
