That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Randomize
