How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
And my parents said I crawled through the house
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
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