im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
wat bout pragnant strippers??
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
