whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize
