I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize