fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
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