No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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