I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
My brain says no but my pants say off.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Randomize