I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize