why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Randomize
