and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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