yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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