So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
