Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
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Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
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