I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
We left the knife in your bed.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
there is glitter all over my balls
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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