i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Randomize
