My liver just broke up with me...
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
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