ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
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