a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
