He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
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