I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
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