i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Randomize
