I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
I think we might need a safe word for this...
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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