You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
Randomize
