I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
