...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Randomize
