Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
My liver just had a heart attack.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Randomize