Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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