you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Randomize
