she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
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