trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
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