Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Randomize
