1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
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defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
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I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
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