Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
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