so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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