I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Randomize
