Texts From Last Night

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  (928): View more from Arizona

  she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.

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  (928): she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college. http://tfl.nu/99x7
  Replies (50) Good night (9258) Bad night (1155)
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  (707): View more from California

  I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.

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  (707): I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child. http://tfl.nu/d3n6
  Replies (4) Good night (2869) Bad night (857)
• Favorite

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....

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  (910): there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time.... http://tfl.nu/4vkt
  Replies (7) Good night (2969) Bad night (1207)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?

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  (727): did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again? http://tfl.nu/o7ua
  Replies (4) Good night (3001) Bad night (1053)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?

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  (203): We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right? http://tfl.nu/13y7
  Replies (9) Good night (1382) Bad night (601)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.

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  (402): She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party. http://tfl.nu/tru3
  Replies (7) Good night (1827) Bad night (457)
• Favorite

  (587): View more from Alberta

  It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.

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  (587): It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse. http://tfl.nu/f8ym
  Replies (3) Good night (1137) Bad night (438)
• Favorite

  (641): View more from Iowa

  She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it

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  (641): She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it http://tfl.nu/mwwo
  Replies (7) Good night (1007) Bad night (455)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.

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  (585): S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding. http://tfl.nu/j7eu
  Replies (1) Good night (537) Bad night (1050)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!

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  (714): You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue! http://tfl.nu/dw09
  Replies (5) Good night (1588) Bad night (634)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.

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  (207): We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night. http://tfl.nu/i415
  Replies (2) Good night (733) Bad night (287)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.

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  (970): I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot. http://tfl.nu/spo7
  Replies (0) Good night (503) Bad night (250)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"

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  (310): I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine" http://tfl.nu/hod3
  Replies (7) Good night (790) Bad night (394)
• Favorite

  (562): View more from California

  I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.

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  (562): I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked. http://tfl.nu/1vom
  Replies (9) Good night (710) Bad night (288)
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"

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  (740): You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!" http://tfl.nu/ubz0
  Replies (2) Good night (250) Bad night (395)

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