did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
