i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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