is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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