I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
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