nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
